Nearly there

I think I may be about to have a bout of insomnia. Anyone who ever struggles with sleepless nights will tell you the worst thing about it is knowing it’s about to happen. You lay in bed, get the thought in your head that you’re going to stay awake, then you start to worry about it which starts your mind whirring and your pulse rate increasing and then it becomes a self-fulfilling whatsit-thingy and you’re doomed to a night of awakedness. 
Bloody nightmare.
Is it possible (I wonder, in a brief aside) for something that keeps you awake to be called a nightmare? Is that oxymoronic? Or paradoxical? See - it’s started already - that kind of shitty thought pattern could keep me going until 3am at least. Then I’ll start to think about work tomorrow, knowing I only have a maximum of four hours sleep available, and by the time I’ve worked out whether I can survive a day at work on the back of four hours sleep, and whether I’ll be able to make up the lost snoozing tomorrow night, another 20 minutes has gone by and I’m that much closer to dawn.
It’s a pain in the arse.
I don’t know where it’s come from. It’s been a long time since this has happened to me. Probably this time last year. What with a wedding, and Christmas, and work stuff, I’m amazed I was able to get to sleep at all last December. At least this year I only have Christmas and work worries to contend with….
Maybe it’s a culmination of busy things that have gone on recently. The band, the threat of overnight opening, the postponement of overnight opening, the confirmation of overnight opening after all, Sophie’s domestic woes. All stuff that’s taken up my time and not been dealt with completely. Maybe now they’re taking advantage of Christmas Craziness to jump to the forefront of my mind and torment me.
There is also the possibility, of course, that had I laid my head down and closed my eyes instead of typing these past few paragraphs of shit I might have fallen asleep by now and all this would be irrelevant…..

RC 23-12-16 
0052 GMT