blue

I have to admit, to myself as much as to anyone else, that I am depressed. I've been feeling a bit under the weather, physically and mentally, and I've been struggling to drag myself out of bed each morning, and I've been finding seemingly easy tasks to be almost insurmountable, and I've been worrying about it all, thinking I might have something seriously wrong with me. And then, this morning, I realised - "I'm depressed." And that's all it is. But that's not a small thing, and it's a very real hindrance, and the acknowledgement of it doesn't make it dissipate, unfortunately, so I still have some work to do to get through it. But I WILL get through it, because I always do.
It's probably hard for anyone who doesn't suffer depressive episodes to understand, but I know any readers who are familiar with it will empathise and sympathise, and that makes me feel a little bit better. The truth is, some of us find life hard sometimes, and it's not a weakness or a lack of effort, it's a condition that we live with and get sideswiped by occasionally; usually when it's the least convenient time for it, to be honest. But admitting to it, instead of ignoring it, and accepting it, instead of fighting it, is a good way to make the episode last for less time, so here I am, outing myself and hoping that it might alleviate my symptoms.

RC 20-2-26