"Hmmm" (a poem)

A dull, dark, dreary day in Suffolk.
Now I am married, what do I do next?
A year of planning and mental toil
Ended when I placed the ring upon the finger.
So what do I do next?
How to occupy a mind that craves activity?
How to fill the Winter hours,
while awaiting the glorious Dawn of Spring?
Philippa would say ‘babies!’
- the logical next step in the well-trodden path of human courtship.
But I say…… “no!”
There must be more, than relationship… wedship… parentship.
Those are ships on which I have wished not to sail.
Even though two of them I have since embarked upon.
The third, I hope, will remain in dock. 

Should I find a new hobby?
Or rather focus on the ones I already have?
Those many short-term obsessions I indulged in,
before casting them aside onto the pile marked ‘bored now.’
The golf, the drums, the magic…
A little progress made; a little money spent; a little time wasted.

In March, when times are brighter,
these moments of lost reflection will seem trivial;
Like a once-worrying fog that lifted before I had to drive,
or some meal I had…. somewhere… sometime…
But for now they sit painful
Upon the ‘torture’ button of my soul.

Yeah, you’re right - it’s time for a drink.

RC 27-1-16