I should have posted this at 8.11pm

It’s been a weird Autumn.
Normally by now I’m sliding into winter depression, but the weather has been so nice recently that it’s feeling like March already. All very confusing really. Daffodils are starting to spring up, birds that should have been in Africa weeks ago are still sitting happily in our hedges, and Old Bill (the perv from around the corner) is still hanging around the bus stop with his filthy summer shorts on.
It must be global warming.
My experiments on rainfall and temperature this year have shown unexpected results. Well, I say unexpected… in truth it’s the first year I’ve done them so I don’t have any other records to compare them to, but I’ve checked with other people online and they all agree it’s been a WEIRD year. The wettest ever August, the warmest ever October; a split-shift Summer that occurred in April/May and then September, and less November rainfall than we’ve seen in decades.
Taking my inspiration from Oscar-winning former-Vice-President Al Gore, I’ve put together a slideshow powerpoint presentation showing how I think Norfolk might look in the future if the weather continues changing as it has this year. Armed with enthusiasm, and my laptop, I showed my findings to Philippa and Ted this afternoon. I don’t think they took my concerns seriously. At one point, I was discussing how increased precipitation and warmth might affect the growth rates of our natural local vegetation. I concluded by saying “In 25 years, grass height in our back garden could reach as much as fifteen feet…”
“Buy a fricking lawn mower then” said Ted.
They can laugh if they wish (and believe me, they did) but they’ll soon come running to me when the water is above their ears and they haven’t got enough tinned food to survive on…
Heathens.

RC 20-11-2011 (cool date)