Oh, man..

I’m not sure, but I think Emily and I almost had that conversation yesterday. You know the one - when you’ve been together too long to call it a shagfest, but not long enough to call it a relationship, and rather than let it go on the same someone feels the urge to analyse it and decide ‘what’s going on.’ I was cooking lunch. I diced some new potatoes and microwaved them in hot water, then threw them in a wok with some soy sauce and fresh ginger. I kept tossing them over a medium heat, gradually adding some peppers and mushrooms and then throwing in some beansprouts for the last couple of minutes. Served it all up with some cold chicken and a glass of cheap white wine. It’s an old favourite that I first cooked at uni. It’s cheap to pay for and easy to prepare, but people tend to go into raptures about it.
I’m aware of the fact that I’m using the meal as a way to deflect from details about ‘the conversation’ and that’s exactly what I did in the kitchen last night. I concentrated fully on slicing, dicing and cooking and tried to avoid Emily’s comments and questions while I plied her with wine and bounced the topic around as deftly as I bounced the food around the wok. She gave up eventually, and we had a nice evening, albeit with a tinge of atmosphere for the first time since we met. I know we need to discuss things eventually, but that’s the bit of relationships that I am crap at, and that’s when things usually start to unravel. How can I discuss long-term plans with someone that I’ve only made a connection with sexually? Shame Clare Rayner died last week, or I’d be calling her up for advice.

RC 7-11-10