Sport list

7 THINGS I’M THOROUGHLY SICK OF AFTER 10 DAYS OF WIMBLEDON:

10-minute montages being used to begin and end every highlights programme.
5-minute montages being shown before every player is introduced.
Close-ups of Andy Murray’s expressionless Barbie-doll girlfriend after every shot.
Close-ups of Andy Murray’s cadaverous turtle-necked mother after every other shot.
Hearing “This is the one tournament that every player wants to win” when it’s quite obvious that some of them don’t.
Seeing shots of people on ‘Henman Hill’ and watching them cheer and wave at the camera.
Being told which mega-rich celebrities are sitting in the Royal Box for free when they’re some of the only people in the country who could actually afford a bloody Centre Court ticket.

RC 4-7-13