Diet dilemma

I haven’t even taken my driving test yet, and I’ve already knocked someone’s bike over… More on that later..

My body is crying out for a take-away. Physically it’s nice to feel healthy, but my mind is screaming “GET ME A CHICKEN JALFREZI YOU BASTARD. NOOOOOOWWWWWW!!!”
I’m finding it hard to resist. The actual following of a diet is relatively easy, it’s just the psychological torment that goes with it that causes grief. If I could switch off my memory so I couldn’t remember the joys of melted Emmenthal, and how good it tastes, and how the feeling of it dripping into your mouth from a sandwich is almost sexual, then life would be sweet. As sweet as the inside of a Crunchie when you stick your tongue in it. Sexual again, you see.. I miss crap food, but I have to confess that my work trousers fit better, and I can climb the stairs to the staff room now without breaking into a sweat.

Something weird has happened.. I could swear on my mothers life that I wrote and posted a blog on Tuesday, but it isn’t on the system, I can’t find it saved on my computer, and I can’t remember for the life of me what it might have been about. Am I insane? Was I dreaming? Is the reality that I think is my life actually a computer game on an astral child’s console, and he is just toying with my sanity for his own hyperspace amusement?

I’ll tell you about the bike tomorrow.

RC 1-5-09
2025 BST