Slept like a baby with an addiction to sleeping pills
over the weekend! Feel much more alive, energised and enthusiastic today as a
result. Tearing through overdue e-mail responses like a food addict tears
through packets of Maltesers. I am bouncing around the site like a
tightly-wound rubber-band ball made by a bored student and I am throwing out
weird similes like a reformed smoker throwing out leftover cigarettes.
Many of those previous sentences alluded toward an
obsession with addiction. I may have to discuss that with my therapist. If I
ever get one.
I’m worried I may have gone from one extreme to the
other – instead of enjoying my renewed effervescence I am overdoing it and
risking dragging myself down again – but isn’t that the story of my life? I’ve
never really been a middle-of-the-road, steering-straight kind of guy, it’s
always been full-on or flat-out; excessive or totally passive; wild swings from
one side of the emotional fence to the other. Trouble is, when you’ve been
feeling tired and unproductive and put-upon, and then suddenly you feel awake
and creative and on-top-of-things, it’s hard not to ride that wave hard and lap
it up while you can.
I hope this has made some sense, my mind is racing
far more quickly than my hands have the ability to type. Maybe I should take
advantage of this and quickly write enough blogs for the next few weeks…
Or maybe it’s far more sensible if I sit down and
relax a bit, and then go back to work.
RC 24-6-19
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