jobsworth

The dole office called yesterday. It was a very tricky moment as the woman who called said “Morning Mr Chesworth, this is Claire..” I was THIS CLOSE to saying ‘Hey up girlfriend – I’ll see you at work tonight’ when I realised it wasn’t Claire from the supermarket..
Apparently we’re not entitled to any extra money after being deserted by mum, as we’re all over sixteen years of age. When I asked how we’re supposed to survive without extras she said ‘Well traditionally, when people need more money they go out and look for a job’ I was going to say ‘How the hell have I got time to look for a job – I’m working four nights a week?’ but decided against it.. There are some things that are best left unsaid. Especially things that might open you up to a fraud conviction..
I suppose I should tell them I’m in employment, but then I’d have to sign off, and then I’d have to sign on again in January, and that would be a logistical nightmare. Forms, booklets, more forms, and appointments. The JobCentre hate new clients and paperwork, so I’m saving them bother in the long run by simply not telling them, aren’t I? And it’s not as if I’m rooking them out of a fortune, is it? Have I convinced you yet? Have I convinced myself? I’ll think about it more tomorrow – there’s a cheese and bacon supreme with my name on it in the freezer, and then it’s time for a post-work shower.
Anon…

RC 28-11-08
1120 GMT