Hope rekindled

Today has been lovely, quite frankly. My doom-laden thoughts of Friday have been rather dissipated by Philippa and I both making an effort today and thoroughly enjoying time together as a family. We had a lovely lunch, we had a nice walk through a picturesque wood and then we popped to see some friends, where we behaved ourselves and chatted like a happy married couple rather than one who have hardly said a kind word to each other in a month!
She even let me watch the end of the French Open Men's tennis final without passing comment on my laziness.
I don't know what changed. Maybe me writing out my thoughts and fears on Friday shifted something in my head and lightened the pressure a little. Maybe it hadn't been as bad as I had thought; or maybe it was, and we both got simply fed up with it being that way and wanted to change it. Or maybe we just both relaxed and just talked to each other instead of being combative or conflictual. Or maybe we both needed a good night's sleep, which we both managed to do last night.
Anyway, whatever it was that instigated it, it's been a bloody welcome change of atmosphere, and I hope we both keep working to keep it this way. One thing it has shown me is that I am absolutely NOT ready to even remotely consider the possibility that I might at some point, now or in the future, be out of a relationship with Philippa. I honestly think I would do whatever it takes to save things, no matter how bad they get, because the idea that it might end is just unbearable.

RC 9-6-24