A few random thoughts

I’ve realised something about myself - I don’t like hearing the sound of ticking clocks. I think it reminds me that my life is disappearing rapidly on towards its inevitable conclusion. Hearing a second hand on a clock move around is like having someone in the corner of the room going “Your life is ebbing away and you’re wasting it! GET UP! GET OUT! DO SOMETHING!”

When I was at school, we had regular visits from a lay preacher who used to do a 15-minute assembly that was normally him screaming at us about fire and brimstone and God’s wrath. One Friday he did a long spiel about us being watched from the Heavens while we masturbated. A bit creepy, really, and makes God sound like a pervert when you think about it. Another time, for reasons I still don’t understand, he felt the need to lecture us on personal hygiene. I remember his words clearly – “EARS and ARSE are important. They should be cleaned every day, and yet most people choose to ignore them.” Not sure why he was obsessed with those particular body parts, but as I’ve got older, I’ve realised he’s right on both counts.

Philippa and I are taking the little man for his first little holiday this coming weekend. Just a few days in a caravan on the Suffolk coast, but it still counts. We waited til September and it was a third of the price that it would have been mid-August.  No wonder people take their kids out of school during term time.

RC 16-9-19