A third of May gone already

I want to change the subject matter of my blogs this week, but it’s hard when my mind tends to be obsessively focussed on one subject at a time. Look back through my online history and there’ll be several sections where I just keep revisiting the same topic for a while. (Usually work unhappiness, the weather, or my wife’s obsession with parenthood.)

I took my bike out for a gentle cyclette this evening, but failed to enjoy the exercise or the scenery as my head was filled with both sides of the ‘Will I/Won’t I’ argument about the new job. I need to distract myself, but when I do things that should distract me I’m distracted from doing them by the thing that I’m trying to distract myself from. Crazy. Maybe alcohol is the answer. In small quantities it can help to switch you off from your problems. In larger amounts it can help you forget them for a while. Take it further and you can just pass out and avoid the hassle completely. Sounds quite an attractive proposition but I’m sure I’ve tried that before and I’m sure it didn’t really work. You can’t avoid these kinds of situations and decisions, you can only postpone them. You have to face them head on and go for it or hide in fear and then make a snap judgement while your head is jumbled. It’s up to you. By which I mean – it’s up to me.

Time for a shower, then some reading.

RC 10-5-18