I’m not saying we’re a nation of exaggerators, but have you noticed how no-one seems to have a simple illness anymore? I’ve been going back over some staff sickness certificates from the past twelve months, and I’m amazed some members of the workforce are still alive with the different serious ailments they’ve had. I blame this ’crisis’ culture we have in the media, where stories are all blown out of proportion to ensure viewers, listeners or readers’ interest. Hyperbole is seen as more important than fact, as that is what will ultimately convince people to purchase. We don’t have a ’possibility of an increase in malignant melanomas’ we have an “IMPENDING CANCER CRISIS”
So here’s a little list of subtle differences I’ve noticed in the way that people describe their health. You might even call it a poem!:
No-one gets a cough, they get a chest infection
No-one gets a cold, they get flu
No-one gets a headache, they get a migraine
No-one has indigestion, they have an ulcer
No-one has diarrhoea, they have IBS
No-one has mood swings, they have manic-depression
No-one gets spots, they get infections
Mind you, who am I to complain? Last time I had a hangover I took two days off with ‘food poisoning’
RC 2-5-13
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