Goodbye June, Hello Hope

In two weeks’ time I will be off work! Obviously, having the employers that I do, they are giving me a gargantuan amount of work to get through before I am allowed to be away for a few days, but Sod Them – they will not dampen my enthusiasm and excitement today, whatever they may choose to throw at me!

It feels weird to be planning time off, because for a lot of you reading this, you’re now getting used to the idea of being BACK at your job after a period of forced home-time. I am very aware that there have been very different ‘lockdowns’ for different people. It’ll take a long time, I think, before the fallout of all this stuff settles and we’re all used to each other again. We’ve all been through so much, and it hasn’t been the same for everyone, so we’ll be trying to support each other through the after-effects while also dealing with the aftermath of our own experiences. So we’ve been through a shared period of trauma, but we can’t all empathise exactly. I’ve had to keep going to work, but I haven’t had to deal with the direct consequences of Covid. I’ve missed being able to socialise, but I haven’t been locked in a city centre tower block, unable to even see a tree. It hasn’t been the same for us all, and we won’t all have the same path back to The Outside World. For me – a big part of the recovery will be sitting at home with Philippa and Mathew and not having to think about petrol for a week!

See you in July, then.

I wonder if the second part of 2020 will be as eventful as the first?

RC 30-6-20

Everything Feels Strange

More people about again today. The slow return to some kind of normality seems to be gathering pace. I’m seeing customers I haven’t seen for three months, the footfall through the pay booth seems to be how you might expect under ‘normal circumstances’ and barely a minute goes by without a car pulling onto the forecourt.

I have to admit that I am not feeling altogether comfortable with it all. Part of me thinks this is all happening a bit too quickly, and we may end up regretting the urge to be out so suddenly, but it’s more personal than that, I think. The truth is – I have really enjoyed leading a quieter, slower, less stressful life. My workload hasn’t really diminished, but it has felt less pressured. The first three weeks or so of lockdown were like a 24/7 mind-melt as we all tried to catch up with what the Hell was going on, but since then my routine has been manageable, relaxed and almost enjoyable. Back in February, I spent huge amounts of time in pointless meetings, compiling pointless reports or dealing with pointlessly angry customers. Most of June has been spent in happier, more productive tasks. I think my fear now is twofold. Firstly, I am scared of going back to that horrible daily grind of Those Above Me asking for information, and a constant flow of customers demanding the Earth. Secondly, and perhaps more strongly, I am scared of the alternative to that – the fact that we may be heading into another new paradigm, with another new way of working to get used to. I have carved out a really nice method of management since March, and I’d really like to continue using it, but unfortunately it only really fits in with The Lockdown Life. Now, I may have to turn my back on it and find yet another new routine, one that is part-past and part-present and part-improvisation. I’m just not sure I have another adaptation in me so soon after the last one.

Maybe I’m being selfish and overreacting. Maybe I’m just tired and have a touch of the Monday Blues and all this will feel unimportant tomorrow. But sitting here today, with everything outside the window looking dangerously as if the virus doesn’t exist anymore, I am feeling very uncomfortable.

RC 29-6-20

If I Were In Charge (part 947)

I was thinking, after typing this week’s blog about a Bounty ice cream, how certain flavours and smells really bring about a feeling related to a certain time of year. Some are obvious – even if you eat a Mince Pie in September, it’ll put you in mind of Christmas – while others are more subtle, and probably more personal. For me, coconut will always, always be a scent of Summer. It is, I know, down to a particular memory from my teenage years. It has something to do with a girlfriend, an evening on the beach, and coconut-scented sun lotion, but I won’t reveal any more than that.

Anyhow, to pass some time while sweating my arse off in my office today, I have compiled some lists. Imagine I am Dictator For Life In Charge Of Designating Certain Smells and Sounds as Officially Recognised Time-Specific National Favourites:

(Or something….)

The Official Taste of Spring – GINGER

The Official Taste of Summer – STRAWBERRIES

The Official Taste of Autumn – PUMPKIN

The Official Taste of Winter – CINNAMON

The Official Colour of….

SPRING – Green

SUMMER – Yellow

AUTUMN – Light brown

WINTER – White

The Official Smell of….

SPRING – Daffodils

SUMMER – COCONUT

AUTUMN – Roasting chestnuts

WINTER – Boiling leeks

The Official Soup of…

SPRING – Spicy parsnip

SUMMER – Asparagus

AUTUMN – Pumpkin

WINTER – Leek & Potato

The Official Sound of…
SPRING – A lawnmower

SUMMER – A buzzing bee

AUTUMN – Conkers hitting

WINTER – Strong winds

RC 27-6-20

Addicted to Conjecture

Thank you to whichever government bod was persuaded to let Premier League football return, and be played at all sorts of different times on all sorts of different days. Our sales of lager and crisps continue to break recent records, and most people buying them seem to be wearing a football shirt of some kind or other.

When the lockdown was first announced (can you believe it was over three months ago?) I thought THAT might be the moment when our alcohol aisles might be shopped dry.  With millions of people on an ‘unexpected extended holiday’ from work, and with lots of uncertainty causing lots of anxiety, and with no-one really sure how bad things would get, or who would still be alive at the end of it, I thought low-grade alcoholism would run amok. But actually, it seems to be NOW that people are turning to their chosen bottle for comfort. I suppose its a good sign – celebratory drinking is less likely to lead to long-term addiction than despair drinking, I would say.
Either way, I now need to order more stock. And it’s not just Stella and Doritos - the ice-cream freezer is emptier than a Jeremy Corbyn Supporters Club meeting. The algorithms and auto-ordering systems that The Company are determined to replace us all with can’t yet make allowances for heatwaves or TV Sport schedules, so humble Rory is still needed to keep the profits pouring in (for now, at least).

RC 26-6-20

The Summer Hits Keep Coming

I have swum in the sea this evening, for the first time in 2020!
It felt good to wash off the months of coronavirus weirdness and re-connect with the watery side of Mother Earth, rather than the I’ll-Show-You-Who’s-The-Dominant-Species Virus side.  
There is something incredibly satisfying about sitting here now, with the feel of sand between my toes and the faint smell of sea salt on my skin. It must be something primal. It seems to give me the same feeling that I get while poking around in bonfire ashes with a stick, or while cooking raw meat on a barbecue. We are only a few generations removed from cavemen, and I honestly believe there are thousands of years of repeated behaviour sitting in our genes, that cannot be forgotten about just because we live in insulated houses, drive air-conditioned cars and feed on frozen food that’s been flown here from all over the world.

An interesting point to finish on…. It has nothing to do with what I’ve already typed, I just felt I wanted to share it:

Heathrow Airport dealt with 6 million passengers during January 2020. During April, there were 210,000. 

RC 25-6-20

At least it could kill off the virus

Baking hot today, and expected to get hotter as the week goes on. Welcome to our annual, all-too-brief spell of Mediterranean weather. Our filling station sold out of bottled water (because, obviously, no-one has water at home that they can put in a bottle and bring out with them) so I had to pootle over to the store and bring some crates back. The walk across the car park nearly exhausted me. I love the sunshine, but there does seem to be an optimum temperature for me, above which I start to crumble mentally and my body refuses to do the things I ask it to without threatening collapse. I rewarded myself for my efforts with a cooling Bounty ice cream. Simply the best buyable lolly ever invented, and very cooling too, so easily justifiable when I have one at 3pm on a Tuesday….

RC 23-6-20

FLITBITS - June 22

More odd rambling musings that I wanted to share with you but didn’t think deserved their own blog postings:

It’s annoyed me for ages that the standard sign-off for most people in Britain – at the end of an e-mail, conversation or letter - has been ‘Take Care’. It raises heckles on my psyche. It makes me want to reply with – ‘don’t tell me how to live my life, shithead.’

But I’ve noticed a strange thing has happened. The new trendy, tropey ‘goodbye replacement’ has become ‘Stay Safe’. Which is odd, because as we head out of lockdown, but with Covid19 still very much in society, surely ‘Take Care’ has never been more appropriate?

Sleep is just practice for Death.

I firmly realise that my time alive is limited. Repeating the same old stuff over and over again is wasteful, so I pride myself on pushing life in unusual directions, and this is particularly true with food. I am determined to experience as many different possible food combinations as possible, so I am willing to experiment with any previous untried mixtures. Sometimes this falls on its arse and I nearly vomit, sometimes it can be a revelation. This weekend, we had homemade pizzas. I made one slice which was just the basic pizza base, with peanut butter liberally spread on top, then baked in the oven as normal.

It was absolutely gorgeous. Beyond delicious. And probably very healthy too…

The most worrying thing in the UK at the moment is that Boris Johnson has now fathered 6 children.

I don’t know about anyone else, but I am not the same person I was pre-Covid19. This whole experience has changed me, and I hope it has changed everyone else too. I have no intention of going back to the same way of thinking and acting that I was committed to before March this year, and I hope everyone feels that way too.

But we’ll see.

RC 22-6-20

It hurts, but it's worth it

Another Sunday, another barbecue, and another occasion of Rory eating enough meat to give ten Lithuanians heart disease.

I don’t feel bad for overindulging and I don’t feel embarrassed to have done ‘the terribly British thing’ by spending a weekend evening cooking in the garden. The weather has been pretty shitty all week so I’ve taken advantage of the pleasantness today.  The original plan was for ‘a burger and a couple of sausages’ each, but as usual I got carried away and once the smell of smoky charcoal hit my nostrils I was grabbing everything out of the fridge and finding elaborate ways to combine it on a skewer. I cooked enough to feed the village for a fortnight. 

My personal highlight was the Jalapeno Minced Beef Mini-Kebabs. Not a creation of my own – Philippa found them in a supermarket when she popped in for a bit of shopping after work. I don’t normally use any store other than my employers (not through loyalty; not through preference; but thanks to my discount card and the ease of working next door) but I may start shopping further afield now, because these came from one of our rivals, and they were marvellous. And I will NOT apologise to my bosses for saying that. I work in the filling stations, not the shop itself, so balls to it. I’m not turning my back on the company, I’m just sampling what the opposition has to offer, and enjoying it.

I actually have no idea what I’m talking about now. I’m so full of food I can barely breathe, much less write coherent sentences.

Now I need to sit very still somewhere and digest.

RC 21-6-20

Another way the world has changed...

I had a tin of ravioli for lunch today. It’s something I remember having as a child, when my mum couldn’t be arsed to cook for us properly, so she would just stick a tin of saucy pasta in the microwave. It was also a frequent meal at university, when eating as cheaply as possible was always an ongoing determination.

Now I don’t know if this is just my imagination, but I swear the tins used to be packed full of ravioli, and the pasta pockets themselves used to be packed full of filling. When I opened the can today, it was like a puddle of tomato soup with a few stray bits of bland dough floating around in it, and the few bits of ‘ravioli’ that were pretending to be ravioli were all-but empty. I think there were two small bits of beef within the entire contents of the tin.  I know it’s never been a particularly healthy option, but at least you used to feel like you’d eaten something. After my lunch break today I felt like I needed another meal.

I hate to send business their way, but if you don’t believe me you should buy a can and have a look.

RC 20-6-20

Better. Bouncing. Broody.

I’ve booked some time off work. Now that things are getting back to being a bit less unnormal, my job has once again become one of planning ahead and preparing, rather than fighting fires and dealing with daily disasters, so there’s been no opposition to my holiday request. I know we won’t be able to go away anywhere – and to be honest, neither of us want to – but at least I can switch off from work stuff for 10 days or so and enjoy more time with my family. I think I’m the only person on my management level in our area who hasn’t been off in the past few months. I’ve had to cover for several of the others at various points during lockdown. That’s been hard, bearing in mind how much extra work I’ve had in the first place. The last thing I needed was to be lumbered with doing someone else’s job as well. But there we are – that’s the way things have been in most industries since March, so I can’t complain too much. The ‘extra work’ for me meant a bit more time on the computer in my office, and a bit more time on the phone. The ‘extra work’ for others this year has involved doubling the number of Intensive Care patients they’re dealing with, and doing longer, harder hours.

In other news – my new favourite pastime is holding Mathew on my knees, facing me, and bouncing him up and down insanely so he giggles like a tickled hyena.

In other news – Philippa has reminded me that we had ‘a brief discussion’ a while ago about providing Mathew with a little brother or sister. She has suggested we use my upcoming time off to achieve it…

RC 19-6-20

Can't all be roses...

I had an annual event happen today, and it’s one that I dread, hate and wish I could avoid. At some point during the late Spring or early Summer, the depressive part of my head points out that it’s nearly the longest day, and very soon we’ll be back on the downward slide towards Winter. The good mood that I have from seeing the flowers blossom, and the birds return, and the late-night sunsets evaporates, and I start feeling shit and full of despair.

Why do I waste the sunny days that I crave, by filling them with thoughts about darkness?

RC 18-6-20

Shoot and swallow

The store sold a huge amount of alcohol and snacks today. I couldn’t understand why, but then it was pointed out to me that Premier League football restarts tonight, and lots of the games will be on television over the next few weeks. So I guess we prove once again that many Englishmen find it impossible to enjoy watching sports without simultaneously imbibing large quantities of lager.

RC 17-6-20

Sciurus carolinensis

Our squirrel came back again today. I’ve done a bit of research, and I think it will be a young one that was part of an early Spring litter, that is now finding his own bit of territory. Being young, he hasn’t learnt the danger of roads and humans, so he’s happy to explore in our garden and steal some of the bird food. The birds, I have to say, don’t seem in the slight bit bothered.  I thought there’d be running battles, or some kind of bloodbath, but the birdies just hang back a bit while the squirrel is nosing at the feeder, and then as soon as he/she has buggered off, they get back to it.

I hope, in a way, we keep seeing him. I suppose because of the Latin name we should christen it ‘Caroline’. (why are humans so obsessed with naming everything? Even inanimate objects like cars and bikes get a nickname, for God’s sake. It’s not as if your Fiesta will come running up the drive if you call it…)

I’m developing this little dream where Mathew and Caroline grow together and become great friends, and I get lots of interesting videos of them sitting in the garden, sharing lunch. Maybe that’s weird of me, but my mind projects forwards however much I try and stop it, and it’s nice to have a cute little dream like that, rather than one where I’m out of a job and struggling to buy Mathew carrots.

RC 16-6-20

Sisters Seen

So distracted was I by my own breathlessness this morning, that I completely failed to give you the big news – our in-garden family get-together happened!

Sophie was here, so were Hannah and Nathan. It was wonderful. Hard not to hug, but sod it – the hugs only last 30 seconds of any visit anyway, so is it such a hardship to not have them?

I’m not sure, but I think we may have broken the rules by having three households together. If so, I apologise to any government bods reading this. I assure you it won’t happen again. I’m an intelligent man but I’m finding it hard to keep up with what’s allowed when, and with whom. We did our best to comply with the rules though. No-one went near anyone else. The visitors brought their own drinks and snacks. Sophie even took a pee in the field next to our house, so she didn’t have to come indoors.

Two hours together and the last three months apart were all-but forgotten.

And my sore throat has subsided as the day has gone on, so I don’t have to panic and hide. 

RC 15-6-20

2035 BST

the late-morning Monday worry-fest

I have a sore throat. I don’t know now whether I need to keep away from everybody, or prepare work for the fact that I might have to self-isolate for 14 days, or whether to leave it til tomorrow and see how I feel. I’m working from home today, so it’s not an immediate issue, but still…

It might be down to the fact that we sat outside all afternoon and evening. The pollen count has been high recently and even those who don’t suffer with hay fever have been affected. Plus, we had a barbecue. Plus, I also had a fire later and burned up some old hedge cuttings and small branches. So I breathed in a lot of smoke. So maybe it’s just a sore throat, but obviously my mind has spiralled into Corona Panic and I’m assuming I’m about to be flattened by Covid19. The chances are, it’s down to the fire, but I’m sure I’m not the only person in the world who has started shitting themselves because they feel a bit breathless.

Now I’ve typed all this I’ve realised how silly I’ve been. But I’ll still feel a bit uneasy, until the throat feels a wee bit better…..

RC 15-6-20

The joy of sand

We took a sneaky trip to the beach tonight, with one of Philippa’s best friends from her badminton club. I say ‘sneaky’ because there’s been so much bad press about people going to the seaside – even though it was okayed by the government weeks ago, based on scientific advice, and even though the virus is almost uncatchable outside, and even though it’s easy to keep 2 metres away from other people, and even though the beaches have been no more crowded than city parks – that we almost felt like criminals. It did get on my nerves a bit last month, when there was an onslaught of online hatred aimed at anyone who took their kids for a paddle after ten weeks of having them shut indoors. It just seemed to be the trendy thing of the day – to lambast anyone who was looking to improve the mental wellbeing of their families by taking them to see the sea. I notice the novelty wore off once people got distracted again by racism.

Anyway – speaking of getting distracted – let me drag myself back to my original topic. We know a nice little secluded beach where you never see many people, even when its the height of Summer and hotter than an African’s oven. There was one other car in the parking area, and it turned out to belong to an elderly couple who were there for a walk with their little dog. We waved at them from about 30 metres away, so I don’t think there’s a chance we may have infected each other.

Mathew had a whale of a time, my mood was lifted considerably, and Philippa looks brighter and happier now than she has for weeks. I think she’s really missed her sporty stuff, and her sporty chums. The great thing is that they’ve set up some outside courts now, so that the badminton folk can get back to playing again. Obviously they have to be very careful and follow strict guidelines, but Philippa’s club is just about fitness and fun, not about competition, so they’re all happy to keep away from each other, and not have any face-to-face battles at the net.

I would like to report on my own social situation, and say that I too will soon have a chance to return to clubs I used to frequent and see people I used to spend time with, but the truth is I have no real hobbies and no real friends, so there’s nothing for me to go back to….

I’m pleased for my wife though.

RC 13-6-20

Our own slice of Springwatch

We had a grey squirrel in our garden this evening! Never seen that before!

I know they can trash your plants and make things bad for the birds, and I know they’re seen by many as vermin, and I know the grey ones are invasive shits who have come over from North America and ousted our native red squirrels by bringing disease and forcing them out of their own hunting grounds, but still. They’re very cute, and it was nice to see one.

RC 11-6-20

FLITBITS - June 10

Some random thoughts scribbled down in my ‘Little Book of Nothing Noteworthy’ over the past five days or so…

I feel more scared of the future now than I did when the virus first reached us.

People seem to have forgotten that we’re supposed to be having a ‘phased re-opening’ of things. We’re not in the clear, and able to go about our old way of life all over again. We need to be careful, all of us, and take our time.

I have a new favourite phrase – “Tepid sponging.”

I read it on an information site about ways to deal with having a fever. I don’t know why, but it just struck me as funny. If I ever record a rap album, I think I’ll call it ‘Tepid Sponging.’

Why do we only think of things we shouldn’t take for granted when we’re in a position without them?

LOTS OF PEOPLE IN APRIL: “I’m really enjoying the extra time with my children…. The NHS is the most wonderful thing in the world…. Keeping indoors is the best idea… The only thing that really matters is your health…. Material things are not important…. The government are doing the best they can in horrible circumstances… Let’s keep an eye on our neighbours… Who cares what I look like, as long as I’m alive?”

THE SAME PEOPLE IN JUNE: “Why aren’t the schools reopening?.... Why have I got to wait three months for a dentist appointment?.... I want to have a BBQ…. If I lose my job, someone better support me…. I need a new phone – this one’s six months old… The government are a bunch of idiots… That twat next door hasn’t mown his lawn for a month… If I don’t get a haircut soon, I’ll kill myself.”

RC 10-6-20

Oh, climate, you cruel mistress...

I never gave you an update on our Long Awaited Much Anticipated Chesworth Family Reunion Barbecue, did I? That’s because it didn’t happen. We’d all got a bit carried away, rushing to get to see each other again, without thoroughly checking what we were up to. So it turned out that Hannah was teaching an online class for her students Wednesday afternoon and couldn’t have got to ours til 7ish, and Sophie had an early shift Thursday morning so she would have had to have headed home about 8. Hardly worth all the effort for less than an hour together, so we postponed. Disappointing, but it will teach us to check our calendars properly in future, and after 3 months without a get-together, another week apart didn’t seem all that bad of an idea. We then pencilled in this coming weekend, but the forecast at the moment is shocking.  Chance of high winds again Saturday, chance of lightning on Sunday! So we may have to hold off AGAIN.

We had glorious weather throughout lockdown. As soon as the PM announced a lifting of restrictions, the weather turned wet and unpleasant. What message are we being sent here????

RC 8-6-20

Quizzing is the answer

We took part in an online Zoom quiz this afternoon, organised by Ted and Beryl’s son Alan. I have to say I wasn’t enthusiastic. I’ve had enough Zoom/Teams/Google meetings through work to keep me going for a decade. But this was different, and it was great. It was really good to see everyone, even if it was just on a laptop screen. Alan was quizmaster, and he had a good selection of questions covering a good range of topics and with a good range of difficulties. I think a quiz should be fun, test your knowledge and teach you stuff all at the same time. This certainly ticked all three boxes. I had no idea that Mike Tyson’s middle name was Gerard, but I probably won’t ever forget it now!

Mathew put in an appearance and was the star of the show. He got quite distracted and excited by seeing all the moving images on the screen. Probably nice for him to see some different faces. I do wonder whether he’ll be affected by not seeing many people during the lockdown. I worry that, when he starts encountering different people again, he might be wary and overawed because he’s simply not used to it. The poor bugger’s only really spent time with me and Philippa in the last 3 months, it’s bound to affect him negatively somehow. Or maybe he’s young enough to take it in his stride, then forget about it. Either way, my worrying won’t do any good.

I need a cup of tea now. Finishing third in an online quiz is exhausting….

RC 7-6-20

Nature is the answer

I cheered myself up today by watching all this week’s episodes of ‘SpringWatch’. I am now calmer than a sloth dosed up with codeine, floating on an inflatable bed in the middle of a sunkissed lake. Frisky foxes, ostentatious ospreys and huggable hedgehogs. How can you watch it and not feel lifted? I am full of the joys of life, even though it’s windy, dull and wet outside. I think this is the best way forward for me – ignore all the people completely and concentrate solely on the animals. The world will seem a much better place, I’m sure…

RC 6-6-20

One more moan, then I'll be positive again...

One day of bad weather after a long spell of early-onset Summer and my mood dropped like a dead fish and yesterday’s blog became a moan-fest!

Well – be warned. It’s been even duller today, and my Suffolk surroundings have been full of that annoying drizzle that leads to an atmosphere of pissy shitness and shitty pissness, so this will be a moany one again.

I don’t understand all these terrible financial forecasts that are filling the news bulletins, now they haven’t got lockdown deaths to report on. I understand that things will be tough and businesses will suffer, but why is it being treated like there’s no reason behind it? Half the world has been in hiding, so of course spending has been altered, right?

This week, there was onscreen panic about the fact that France will see a 10% economic shrink this year. Well, they should, shouldn’t they? No-ones been doing anything for 3 months, of course there’ll be consequences. But it only looks bad if you compare it to previous years business figures. If you take it as a year like any other, of course it’ll look shit. But this has been exceptional. Can’t every company agree that 2020 doesn’t really count, or should have a big asterisk next to it, and then go on and see what the next 12 months bring? No – I guess not. Because that’s not how our stupid economic systems work. Shareholders are only happy with an annual increase and a drop in profits is counted as a loss.

Well – tough shit, everyone. It ain’t happening this year, so deal with it. And we can deal with it, can’t we? We don’t have to go charging back into our same-old shitty way of living just to keep the profit wheels spinning, do we? Haven’t we learned that there are more important things to concentrate on?

Maybe not. But then I’m not an economist, so what do I know? All I know is that the company I work for, who saw their income soar in the early days of coronavirus when people were buying enough food to fill three houses, are now warning us there may be staff cuts as a result of any economic downturn. Employees who put in extra effort this Spring may be out of a job by Autumn.

Classy. Real classy.

RC 5-6-20

Blue Thurs

I’m not enjoying the month of June so far. Lots more people about, and they all seem to have forgotten the lessons learned and gone back to being selfish, uncaring, self-centred, demanding feckwits. Whatever happened to that all-in-it-together, thinking-of-others, keep yourself safe, as-long-as-we’re-healthy-everything’s-okay attitude we were all displaying back in April? It’s almost as if we’ve forgotten what’s been happening and pledged to plunge back into life-as-it-was. As usual, I blame the media. Every newspaper headline this week has been throwing blame at people, stirring up the masses to be angry again, or trying to convince everyone to throw themselves back to normality. It’s all about ‘getting back what you’ve been missing’ rather than ‘be thankful for what you’ve got’.

I despair.

RC 4-6-20

Can't win 'em all

Noticeably busier on the roads and in the garage today. I read something somewhere that said the traffic during May was back to the levels we had in the 1950s, and that the amount of exhaust fumes we emitted was back to the levels of the early 1900s, when there were far fewer cars but those cars were far more polluting. Does that make sense? I hope so. Does anything make sense anymore, when we compare it to how things were 6 months ago? It’s all so very new and so very strange. Except it isn’t. Because most things are still the same, it’s just our places in the outside world that have altered.

Jesus, a brand new month and I’m talking nonsense already.

I’m having good thoughts, I’m just not articulating them in a way that makes them readable. So I might change the subject….

Over the weekend I watched ‘The Magnificent Ambersons’ which is one of the best films ever made, and then I watched ‘Cell’ which is definitely NOT one of the best ever. It’s an absolute mess. I very rarely bail out of a movie before it’s over, but I would quite happily have gone to bed after about 15 minutes of this tripe, and by the end I was wishing I HAD gone to bed after 15 minutes. I shall not write more about it or I shall be torturing myself further.

I promise these blogs will get better as the month goes on……

RC 1-6-20